RE: what part goes numb first?

Now, I don't think that is exactly what I said. Your ups and downs are part of you, what make you who you are ... which is truly special.

what part goes numb first?

Wnen you drink? It's my arms. Makes it harder to tyep.

I was thinking I'm sorry you have to manage me -- waiting for me to go up or down, like ;you said. That's all. I'm just sorry you have to do that.

RE: Friendship

Just call me the jack man (ha, that has double meaning)

RE: Friendship

I figured you didn't want me to say anything. Or maybe it was some medication side effect... But I don't even know if you are on medication because you haven't really told me that. Could just be me. I feel like I should ask more questions sometimes, but then I don't know if that's the right thing to do.

RE: Neil says hello

Lucky for them, your hair works to their advantage by covering your ears.

I thought the neighbor boy was cutting his grass so he can walk around (in his new tie?).

Oh, I see you're a busy woman - Ms. Popularity
:)

Thanks

Thank you for meeting me. I tried not to be a downer, don't know if I succeeded. You really threw me with that growing up and moving on comment. I know you said you didn't mean me, but it hurt, a lot. How could it not? Oh well, hope I didn't take up too much of your time.

Finally

I wanted to take yet another opportunity to apologize to you for our love affair, the aftermath, and my crazy behavior. It seems common to place most blame on me, and I can fully accept it. I never wanted to hurt you or anybody else, but we both know that isn’t possible. A day doesn’t pass when you don’t linger in my mind. Losing such a great friend hurts worse than anything. I often find myself with stories or ideas but quickly return to reality knowing you are gone.

To restate, the only purpose of this message is a final apology with no thought of a reply or anything else. There is no hidden meaning or motive, just a man beat up (yet again) recently over everything so it is all fresh in my mind. Also, this isn’t a call for any type of sympathy, just wanted to send some thoughts your way and then leave you alone.

In addition to being lectured by a few persons and later arguing with them, it was strange to have your ex-husband post on my blog (only a few times) and furthermore his relationship our ex co-worker, but who am I to figure it out or judge it – but just a bit odd.

I sincerely do hope that you are doing well. Your blog implies it, but we all know blogs are not reliable sources. I apologize for not responding to an email you sent about a month ago – it was intercepted and deleted without a response (so, just to explain that). I know it is not worth much, but I will always love you.

Be strong.

RE: Monday meeting

Oops, sorry about that. Thanks for letting me know.

I hope you are doing well.

RE: Monday meeting

wrong e-mail

Monday meeting

I wanted to confirm our meeting Monday afternoon. Please give me a call if you need to reschedule.

RE: Hello

Hey,

Yeah, it has been close to a month. Who says life is supposed to be easy? You don't have to answer that. Anyway, I just take it day by day and try to stay busy to keep my mind occupied. Sorry, I know that sounds silly, I guess that is how a lot of people think.

It looks like you've been partying and staying busy, so I hope you had a great holiday. I hope you don't wear those leather pants to work - not that they look bad, but it seems like they could be uncomfortable and there is no reason to give [him] a heart attack.

Yes, a happy new year would be good for all of us - especially your mom, I hope the surgery is successful and she is feeling better soon.

Hello

Well, it's been about a month since we last spoke, hasn't it? I truly hope you are doing well. You know I always wanted the best for you, for you to have everything you ever wanted. Perhaps not having the stress of me being around has made life easier for you? I like to tell myself that, and that maybe knowing that I care about you could make you like yourself a little more. I do care about you and I never wanted to hurt you. That was never, and will never be, my intention. I remember that you said that you wanted to be left alone, and I'm not trying to cause trouble for you, I just wanted to say Happy New Year.

If there's ever anything you need, you know where I am.

RE: Checking

Hi,

I guess I'm okay, considering. I rented an apartment today. I guess it will take a couple of days for the utilities to be turned on, but I can start moving my stuff in tomorrow. I'm trying to pack. It's been a very long, difficult weekend.

Hope you're doing well.

RE: And so

I've caused you too much pain and trouble - I'm sorry. I've never regretted loving you, but I do regret getting you to feel the same about me. You deserve so much more. Don't hesitate to call on me if you ever need anything.

And so

It's best if we don't see each other, at least for a long, long time. Apparently, you get something positive out of it, but I don't, not at this point. I don't want to be hurt by you any more. It's time that I think of and take care of myself.

As long as you're around confusing and manipulating me, I won't be able to move on. I'm single now, and I want to be open to someone who will treat me with love and respect, and want to be treated with love and respect by me. Who will want me to be who I am, and not hide my love or debase myself.

I know that you don't need me, and you will be fine. You should be concentrating on your family, anyway.

I'm not sorry that I love you, but I'm sorry that it came to this